Rear End in the West End

The Roundabout at the Centre of the Controversy

St. Thomasian courteous drivers have revolted against the self-centered nature of the roundabout, the new norm in this small rural city is to stop on the roundabout to let waiting vehicles enter.  While this is a polite approach in a slow-moving town, aggressive drivers from snooty towns (which we’re also too polite to name) have rear-ended local roundabout users.  

This phenomenon started shortly after the roundabout was installed. It took almost a week to erect the instructional sign and by that time cautionary politeness had already set in. As any local could have told you, once we develop a habit around here it will take more than a paltry sign or highway law for us to change our ways. As Edward Foote said, “Look, if these things were that important then they woulda had that instructional sign, or whatever it is, up sooner.”

Edna Heide a spry 85-year-old (equipped with brand new prescription spectacles and a newly minted driver’s license) gave another reason for this polite driving etiquette “When I was a girl we figured this stuff out on our own, we didn’t need these signs then and we don’t need them now.”

Mildred Thoroughgood, always wanting to get the last word in, added “Have you ever tried reading the rules of the road on a single street sign while staying on the pavement at 50 km/hour? Fiddlesticks! I have a hard-enough time staying on the road as it is – I’m not going to endanger lives trying to read some over-thought-out sign designed by some Torontonian millennial snowflake in a fancy office whose never even had a driver’s license!” 

Update: There have been an additional five rear-end incidents since press time.